What Would Jesus Tweet?
@mothermary what time is the wedding? Should I bring something? All I got is water.
Dear @moneylenders No, I'm not sorry. You should be ashamed. Lucky for you this isn't the Old Testament or you'd be in 4 some smiting.
Check out new blog post on revised & simplified 10 commandments. I edited it down to just 2. You're welcome.
2 commandments: Love God with all thy heart. Love thy neighbor as thyself. P.S. Loving thy neighbor implies not killing them, etc.
@peter Come, follow me. Fish on Friday?
Follow Friday @matthew @mark @luke @john
@lazarus take up your bed and walk.
Yes I CAN swim, it was just easier to walk on water that day. Sheesh. Should I swim in the earth for you, too?
@james Where are the fish & loaves? Must I do EVERYTHING? Oh, never mind, I'll take care of it.
In the market square hangin with @harlotmary and @disciples. Put down your stones, people! Nothing to see, here!
@SisterMary thanks for the reflexology and aromatherapy. OMG my feet feel fantastic!
To the woman who touched my robe: you're healed. You're welcome.
RT@blindbutnowcansee Thank God for Jesus!
Going back home to Nazareth with @joseph @mothermary @harlotmary & @disciples
Hey tweeps, going to the desert, back in 40 days.
Sitting in the garden with @God talking about cups.
Heading back into Jeruselum to have dinner with my homies.
@peter Yes! See you there! Happy to have such a faithful follower.
LOL Good one! RT @eddieizzard "Take this wine, it's a merlot."
@judas Really? For 30 pieces of silver? #thissucks
To the guy who speared me: I forgive you.
Forgiveness for everyone! It's on me. You're welcome.
@mothermary & @harlotmary go to the cave in 3 days. I've got a surprise for you.
@thomas NOW do you believe? Sheesh.
OK, tweeps. That's it for now. Go out and do good works, I'll be back in a coupla 1000 years.