Yesterday, while stopped on the interstate, I tuned into a radio station to get some traffic info. I heard an ad that was so not-meaning-to-be-funny but was:
Give Mom the gift of safety for Mother's Day. Give her the firearm of her choice.
Because nothing says I love you, Mom like a handgun. It got me to thinking about how other businesses could use Mother's Day. Forget the obvious choices of bouquets, jewelry, or spa treatments . . .
Instead of flowers that wilt and die, give your mother something she can really appreciate: Valium. The old-fashioned remedy for ennui and angst, tranquilizing mother's since the 1950's.
This Mother's Day, give Mom a pest-free home. We'll kill your bugs inside and out for her special day.
Trying to think of something special for Mother's Day? Why not consider her own storage unit to fill with future useless crap she gets for Mother's Day.
This stuff just writes itself as XM Radio Guy says. Last year for Mother's Day, XM he gave away pregnancy tests, pearl necklaces, and I forget what else, on his radio show. Hahahaha