Monday, May 19, 2008

Relax Dammit

It’s a running joke in my family that if anyone says “relax,” it is automatically followed with a “dammit.” It’s an unfortunate anchor related to my chiropractic father. He was really wonderful with friends and patients, but when it came to his family…there would come a point where his impatience won out, and as he was adjusting us, he would say, “Relax, dammit.”

I’ve had the opportunity to be working at the Mimslyn spa, where we offer couples massages. Basically you’re massaging two people in the same room. It eases the nervousness some people might feel receiving their first massage. This most often refers to husbands who are strong-armed into getting a massage.

"What you need is a massage."

As a massage therapist, I really believe almost every BODY can benefit from a massage. Bruce Lipton says that 95% of disease is related to stress. We hold that stress and tension in our bodies and massage is a great way to release it. When you feel better, you do better. That said, I’ve seen a husband dragged to a weekend get-away (and end up on my table) because his wife said he needed to relax. Dammit. He wanted to stay home and watch Tiger playing golf. I am confident he did receive benefits from the massage, but will that cancel out the resentment towards his wife for missing Tiger?

Most recently, a well-meaning sibling scheduled a massage for a brother on his wedding day because he needed to relax. The poor boy. He’d never had a massage, didn’t want a massage but was there under obligation. Yikes! Keep your shirt on—and the rest of everything. I did a percussor session with him and we chatted a bit. I did work that tension out of his shoulders. And by the end of our session, he was relaxed. :-) Dammit.

It’s v. easy for other people to tell us what we need. [Read with Dr. Phil voice] I’ll tell you what YOU should do, you should _______.

Sometimes we can offer a different perspective. And sometimes we *should* on other people according to our own values and preferences with advice that is most often unsolicited. That’s when we cross the boundary into Relaxdammit Land.

Now shut up and get on the massage table. hahaha

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