Blackberries

I went berrypicking with Fisherman Willie & wife. Around the perimeter were more berries, but they were small. Looking into the thick of the patch, on the hillside were the choiciest blackberries. What to do? Stay in the easy area or venture down the hillside into the thick of it? Some answers are easy: go to the best berries. The process of executing that answer . . . was a bit more involved. As I was wading thru the briars, I was thinking of a story Dave Dobson tells when he says that you have to risk going out on the skinny branches to get the best fruit. Black berry picking was my metaphor for the day.

It takes some foresight: I was dressed in jeans & a long sleeve shirt, but that was also based on my experience berrypicking as a child. Funny how some answers are easier when you've done them before. And you may expect to get a thorn here or there, but the promise of the sweetness of blackberry jam is worth it!

Risk

I got an email from a friend yesterday about some family drama and I had a choice. Because we always have a choice. I could let it sit and hope the storm would blow over like last time, or I could write a Hallmark card with a "times-are-tough" vibe. Or I could tell the truth of how I see it and risk offending her. Guess which option I went for?

The above quote is from Jerry Stocking in the first workshop I attended with him last summer. I think I am ready to stop editing myself. Whenever you have to edit what you say for fear of a person's reaction, it limits the level of the relationship. How deep can you go? Not very. It limits what you can talk about. It limits your experiences with that person.

Why do I edit myself? I do it because I don't want to hurt someone's feelings. But does that really serve the relationship? Does that really help the person in the long run? If I just tell them what they want to hear, then they stay stuck where they are. Do you really want my help? It might not come in the way you want, but I promise that it's the best I can do from an open heart.